PEACE

Sunday, January 10, 2010 @ 10:26 PM

Feeling So Down!! WHY? ?

Hey2 Ppl!! Sorry if tis entry is abit longer then usual. . Just expressing myself. .

First of all, MizNadz, u miss me. . hahaha. . touching nyer. . shall meet u up soon okie. . aniting give me a beep larr. . u arh. .

Nw back to reality. .

Many tings happen since the 1st of January and up to dis day. . The only time i felt happy was, 5th and 6th of Jan. . other than tat, my life is so fcuk up. . why 5th and 6th happy? ? cos celebrated Nana Lanaeira B'day. . at the same time was happy cos get to spent two days with my love one. . to me she is my love but to her im nt. . hahaha. . bt we r just plain frens. . took alot of pics dat day. . wanna see them, go to Lala's facebook. .

Cut the story short. .

After 6th of Jan, it was hell for me. . Didnt get to fullfill my promise to Lala. . Dat pissed her off. . i was in a situatuion dat i really dun knw wat to do. . haizz. . she was really angry. . i was really scared at tat moment. . call me sissy if u want to but, i indeed cried cos i hurt Lala. . it was really unintentional. . dat nite didnt went back hm, walk around singapore. . cried alot. . i wanted to ease my mind dat nite. . many tings go through my head. . Sorry Lala if u were worried. . if nt nvm. .
Dated 8th Jan 2010. .
A year before, i broke off wif my loved one, Iidakatek. . and again dis year, i lost Winnie cos she hate me and i hurt Lala. . Had a big fite wif fam members. . haizzz. . wtf. . felt so down. . 8th Jan will never ever be forgotten. .
Dat morning met Lala liked promised and it was really awkward as me and her didnt talk to each other. . the only ting dat i ask her is, "Wat time must i reach ur school? ?". . and she replied wif her fingers 12. . soon enuf i took the bus home. . dats where another hell begins and my thoughts run wild. . i was scared dat wat happened the day before will happen again and indeed it happened. . i broke another promise to Lala. . and in total, in January, i broke 3 promises. . wat a bastard i am. . i havent had enuf sleep, havent eat and dis happens. . and to make tings worse, i was fired frm my newly full-time job. . haizz. . had a big quarrel wif dad and bro in the middle of a shopping mall. . i was really angry. . fought wif my brader and shouted at my dad in front of ppl. . shame on me. . a useless and rude son i am. . Lala called and i also shouted at her. . i knw she was paranoid abt her lappy nt wif her. . and she has a test dat afternoon. . i knew she was lying abt her test timing but i ignored it cos my mistake is much more bigger. . after collecting her lappy, went to her school and another "show" happen at her school. . im a fucker hu shouts at my dad. . haizz. . but thx to Nana hu was there to pull me away before aniting happens. . . . soon after Lala went for her test and i was wif Nana. . let out all my feelings to her. . wanted to cry but tahan all the way. . thx Nana fer lending me ur ears. . had dinner, Nana treat. . arh. . cant type already. . remembering wat happen and typing it makes me wanna cry. . stop here larr. . haizz. . sorry if its too long. .

SHOUTOUT: I LOVE YOU LARR. . Y CANT U SEE DAT. . I REALLY AM HURT. . CRIED LIKE A SISSY. . HAIZZ. . NOTING ELSE COMES OUT FRM MY HEART, ONLY SINCERITY AND HONESTY. .